So half of 2015's now past, and it's been... interesting.
In January I was a complete mess: my mind and my body were numb and I had a hard time doing basically anything. School was choking me and the assignments just piled up behind me as I had neither energy nor motivation to do them on time. Socially it was a bit better but overall my everyday was overshadowed with feelings of guilt, shame and the tendency to cry over all and nothing.
In February, after having taken a slight break from my life with a vacation in London with Himyaviewen
and still not feeling any better, I decided that my health had to become a no.1 issue on more drastic terms. SO! I got hold of a doctor's appointment for my mental and physical state, as well as talked to the school about delaying this term to a later schedule - take a time out. Thus I managed to get a study break for the entirety of this term. The doctor's appointment was a success too: I had a grave case of anaemia, and my thyroid gland wasn't working as it was supposed to. After being assigned iron tablets and medication for my thyroid issues (which is a chronic condition and thus will require medication throughout my entire life), plus was put on waiting list to see a psychiatrist, things started to look a bit better.
Luckily, I was given the opportunity to work throughout March as a sub-theater educationalist. This meant 2 evenings a week leading theatre groups at a fairly nearby culture school. Just enough work for me to get by on the money, as well as get the social bits and still not burn out completely. It brightened my life a lot at the time, and gave me plenty of appreciated challenges. Amongst others I got the previlige to work on a performance from the start, as one of the groups completely scratched their previous idea and jumped onto a new project my very first lesson with them.
In April we celebrated my dad's 60th with a trip to England, after deducing that it was the financially correct thing to do (earlier we had planned to go to the US, but the price was just too steep for what we wanted). It turned out to become (almost) 3 weeks of awesomeness, and despite all my fears in concern to my brother's autistic tendencies and my mother's occasionally short fuse we had a genuinely good time with few argues. 12 days of roadtrip around England, then another 6 days in London: plenty of fun and plenty of learning. Some highlights would be 'Shepreth Wildlife Park' in Shepreth, outside Cambridge; the film set of 'Emmerdale' in Esholt, outside Leeds; our amazing hotel 'The Westleigh Inn' in Bradford, where the breakfasts were divine; the aquarium 'Sea LIFE Manchester' in, tada, Manchester, where I could've spent SO MANY MORE HOURS; and Madame Tussauds in London, which I have been wanting to go to for ages and that had a wonderful Avengers' part while we were there :3
The rest of April was fairly uneventful: I got to know my blood levels were higher, but got the order to stick to the iron tablets throughout May. I also got to work a bit more with the aforementioned theatre classes.
In May I returned to work with the theatre classes - same classes, actually - although it went down to 1 evening a week. The work with the performance proceeded, and as I was allowed to stay on the project meant that I also got to follow it from scratch to finished product. The group had their first and only show in the last days of May, and afterwards I admit that it was teary goodbyes for my part.
Also, my brother moved out to his own apartment at the beginning of May, and celebrated his birthday there. My parents and I found the house much too quiet after his departure, but we were all happy that he seemed to be loving his new place.
It was also this month that I tried LARPing again! Yes. It was nice, and quite fascinating to return to something I've loved: acting and improvising as a participant, not a teacher. Hopefully I will continue with it, although situation demanded I only managed one before the summer break.
And thus came June. It's still too quiet since my brother moved out, but we - my parents and I - are discovering more and more advantages of the change, and I dare say we are happier now. It sounds sad to say, but while I love my brother dearly, he was a strain on the family as a whole as we all had different opinions on how to handle living with him. And thus I genuinely believe that all four of us are happier with the current arrangement. He loves his apartment and the other people living in the house, and my parents and I have less restraints at home that puts a strain on us.
I've also turned 28, I stopped with the iron tablets, and I'm feeling better and better, mentally. I have my slumps, and I am still isolating myself but I'm recovering, slowly but surely. The only cloud on my sky right now is finances, but I will hopefully sort that out as well as time goes by - I don't allow myself to worry about it as it is. And of course a recent tooth ache, which apparently is yet another tooth that needs a root canal filling, to my great dismay. Even so, it has to be done.
As for the rest of the year, I don't know. The rest of June is pretty much set: I'll be working on MySpace (my mobile home), and get a visit from Eviyanna
. I've also got some commissions I want to finish ASAP, and hopefully I'll be able to work more on personal projects.
July is Camp Nanowrimo, as well as working on the essay from last autumn with Alakazam
, plus - I hope - photosessions and other things I've been meaning to do but felt too guilty to do. Lots of Me-Time. Watching movies. Tv-shows. Video games. I've got a lot to catch up on, and I really need to get around to do so.
August is Essay month, as well as the most likely time I'll be getting the aforementioned root canal filling, and further than that I haven't planned.
In September school starts again (hopefully! Alakazam
and I have to get our essay ok'd first so we're holding our thumbs), and then there's a whole term of advanced theatre classes to look forward to.
I'm hoping there will be more LARPing, possibly ConFusion, and I honestly haven't dared to plan much further than that. Either way, I'm hoping it will be a good finish to 2015
Take care, my lovelies, and I hope your second halves of 2015 will be brilliant